AVENIJE: SVEŽ KRUH IN SLANINA ZA REGRAT

| 24/03/2013

polnocni-eksces

Danes sem se zgodaj zbudil. Šel sem v mesto po svež kruh in slanino za regrat. Šel sem k slovenskemu najboljšemu sosedu. V veletrgovino v predmestju, tisto novo, ki je izpodrinila tisto veletrgovino na drugem koncu mesta, tisto staro veletrgovino. Slovensko je najbolje. Vstopil sem skozi počasna vrteča se vrata. Kar upočasnila so moj um pred vstopom v tisto veletrgovino. Končno sem vstopil. Stopil sem s hitrim korakom proti svežemu kruhu in slanini za regrat. Neko čudno brezveterje me je zadržalo. Korak ni bil hiter. Svež kruh in slanina za regrat sta bila vedno dlje. Pred seboj sem videl številne ovire. Sovražnike?

NOVA RUBRIKA AVENIJE – PREBIJANJE TANČIC MALOMEŠČANSKIH NOČI

Spoštovana bralka, spoštovani bralec Čuvarja! Verjetno ste malce začudeni nad prvimi vrsticami tega članka. Ne ustrašite se! Gre za prvi tekst v naši novi rubriki, ki se imenuje Avenije. Tole so o njej zapisali njeni ustvarjalci: “Vaši umi so široki, naši pa še širši. Umi mladih so široki kot Avenije. Betonirali jih bomo novomeški mladci in mladenke, ki svoje življenje posvečamo prebijanju elegičnih tančic malomeščanskih noči.”

Stopal sem naprej. S tako zelo počasnim korakom po tisti veletrgovini. Okoli mene so stali. Množica njih. Ovir. Majhni so brezumno poskakovali, veliki žalostno pohajkovali, oni srednji pa zamišljeno posedali. Zdelo se mi je, da se svet tam vrti počasneje. Vedno več njih je poskakovalo, pohajkovalo in posedalo. Premikali so se s počasnimi koraki od vrat do vrat. Zanimalo me je, kaj stoji za vrati. Hodil sem s počasnimi koraki proti cilju. Upiral sem se jim, zavratnim agitatorjem. Počasi sem se bližal svežemu kruhu in slanini za regrat.

Stopal sem in jo zagledal. Oviro. Stala je nekaj korakov pred menoj. Že je pogledovala proti meni. S tistim krčevitim nasmehom. S tistim izmučeno nagubanim obrazom. Bila je ovira. Prisiljen sem bil. Skrenil sem s poti, stopil sem skozi vrata.

 

In odbil sem se od prvega modrijana na levi strani slavoloka,
kakor bi bil električna žoga,
in
priletel v modrijana na desni strani.
Od tega sem se zopet odbil
in
odletel v modrijana na levi strani
in
odbijal sem se navzgor
vedno v kotu 45°.
O, ali sem udaril ob vzmet?
Zaneslo me je od prvega modrijana do modrijana na desni strani.
Kdo ve, kdo je uravnaval moj polet.
 
(Podbevšek 1925: 21)
 

Kmalu sem ugotovil, da so bili modrijani zli. Ugotovil sem tudi, da sem se odbijal navzdol. Padel sem. Tla so bila spolzka. Komaj sem vstal. S počasnimi koraki sem se vrnil proti vratom. Modrijani so me samo molče gledali. V očeh sem jim videl srd. Videl sem tudi strah. Pa žalost.

Ni je bilo več pred vrati. Lahko sem nadaljeval. Uprl sem se zlim modrijanom, odločil sem se premostiti vse ovire. Nič me ne ustavi, sem sklenil. Korak sem pospešil, skakal sem s skale na skalo, pod menoj hudournik. Da, dvignil sem se. Videl sem ju že, svež kruh in slanino za regrat, tam na koncu veletrgovine. Stekel sem, a tok je bil premočan. Zopet sem padel. Zaradi majhne ovire, tiste brezumno poskakajoče ovire, ki sem jo začutil pod seboj. In nenadoma je bila nad menoj. Zviška so me pogledale tiste prazne oči. Obležal sem. Nad seboj sem videl vrteti se tisto veletrgovino, svež kruh in slanina za regrat sta bila zdaj na levi, zdaj na desni strani. Nisem več vedel, kje sem. Ujel sem se med tiste veletrgovinske lotofage.

O in koliko jih je bilo, pojočih o ljudeh drugačnosti! /…/ In kako malo jih je bilo, ki so mogli izpovedati vse, kar jim je težilo srce! O gorje, o groza!
Sto in sto oči je bilo iz bajarja uprtih v zamaknjenega fantiča.

(Podbevšek 1910)

Danes sem se pozno zbudil. Zaspano sem pogledal okoli sebe. Bil sem v nežnem objemu svojega dekleta, zunaj je sijalo pomladansko sonce. Dvanajst preč je bilo. Šel sem v mesto po svež kruh in slanino za regrat.

TEKST IN FOTO: DUŠAN SMODEJ

Rubrika: IZPOSTAVLJENO, UPOR 2012

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